New Years Resolution Chapter 5

New Years Resolution Chapter 5

My week off was spent finding a place a bit closer to work, Larry was so grateful for my help he stayed home from work to help me find a place, which I was lucky, this place is 3 blocks from the county building where I will work, no more subway, yet far enough from Corey to keep our independence while we get to know each other. I do not plan on getting a car, I plan on walking and if I have to because of weather I can take a bus. Larry helped me pack what little I had, the flat came furnished.

After getting my belongings into the apartment I wondered about getting some furniture, bed especially, reclining sofa, table chairs and 2 bar stools to start with. My best friend Rose offered to take a day and help me shop, we found all of what I needed at Art Van’s, with next day delivery. I slept on the floor in a sleeping bag and pillow, not the most comfortable, Corey said I could have stayed at his place, but I wanted the time alone to nest and get to know my new neighborhood and neighbors. Corey’s friends told me that it was a quiet neighborhood I should be happy there.

My furniture arrived just before 4pm the next day, I took the time to make the bed, called for some take out Chinese, I was pleasantly surprised to find in this part of town they deliver Chinese to your door. I wondered if they do it by rickshaw, or car. Found out car, I ordered enough in case Corey stopped by, which he did not, he said he would be working late into the night, being a Detective he does not punch a time card. Seems in the opposite part of the county there is a guy killing high end prostitutes, leaving his calling card which Corey would not tell me what it was. Just said simply he knew it was the same guy who killed 3 other hookers, just by the calling card.

I asked Corey if I should be worried being that I will be walking to and from work, he said no, this guy is working the North end of the county, he has not crossed over to the south end as yet. It was the as yet that gave me pause.

I took that evening to settle in and take stock in the changes that have happened since my new years resolution. I am being just as out going but not as gullible, which has paid off professionally. My new job with the District attorney’s office will be the same as my old job, going over files, looking for discrepancy’s, except now I will be prompting the good guys on their testimonies and also encouraging more evidence. My pay will be better, I will work towards a county retirement, all of which is a bonus.

I have a 3 day weekend considering it is Friday, Corey said if it was ok he may be done by 11 pm for the night he would stop by, I told him it was fine bring beer, and some Nacho’s Bel-Grande from the local Mexican restaurant by the department.

Corey arrived by 10 pm which was a nice surprise, it was his first view of the new apartment, which he said was utilitarian, I agree, not as homey as my flat with the front porch, and back yard, but it will do just the same, it has a door wall with a postage stamp size patio, and a small wooden privacy fence to separate our postage stamps.

I had bought a small out door table and chairs on my shopping spree. We ate the nachos outside, washing them down with cold beer.

I told Corey no shop talk, I could tell by the strain in his voice and on his face he was not liking how things were going. He agreed he needed to turn off his head for awhile and come at it fresh in the morning. So we finished our nacho’s and beer, and I gave Corey something else to think about. By the time I was done with him we fell asleep in a limb tangled pleasured sweat heap.

Saturday I went with my reusable grocery bags folded under my arm, got on the bus to go to the Market 4 blocks down. Coming home since I had one of those rolling baskets that my totes fit in, I decided to walk home. Figuring it would take me at least an hour, I made sure I had a cooler bag for the perishables, and off I went. Coming back after 1 block I was passing the county building, I stopped for a moment to look and give a moment for all this to sink in. A man approached me from behind and said “Do not turn around, I want you to go to your left and continue walking, do not turn around or I will be the last thing you will ever see.”

My heart started to race, I wanted to scream and cry all at once, I was not sure which was more needed at the moment, I just did what I was told. I walked slowly and deliberately, the man told me to pick up the pace, he sounded familiar but I was not sure, his voice was forced like he had a cold or was deliberately concealing his identity.


New Years Resolution Chapter 4

New Years Resolution Chapter 4

We both ordered a burger and fries another round of beers which Corey insisted I let him buy this time. I smiled nodded my head congenially, we chatted amiably sharing the basics. Corey had his car with him this time, but since we both had a few to drink he grabbed a change of clothes from the trunk of his car, and we went to my place. The desert was delicious, the next morning we went out to breakfast, retrieved his car and went for a drive. We made a pact, not to talk about work, also that we would see where this relationship would go.

We stopped at this nice cafe out in the middle of no where, drove slowly back to my place after picking up steaks, salad makings, beer, also stopped at his place pick up some essentials, the evening was spent in each others arms, then grilling in the back yard. Larry came down the stairs, stopped dead in his tracks, took one look at Corey and turned on his heels and walked away without saying a word.

Me: “That was odd, Larry is usually chatty and personable.”

Corey smiled both eyebrows raised, eyes wide and said “Your neighbor is a registered sex offender, seems he has a habit of having a few too many and pisses where he pleases.”

Me: “Seriously someone charged him as a sex offender?”

Corey: “Newbie Patrolman, he said that he gave Larry a few chances only to get the finger so, it seems he has made an enemy.”

I made a mental note to talk to Larry about getting his record expunged.

The rest of the evening was splendid, waking up in a sweat of gooey love it is wonderful, showering together is even better, but I told Corey I am kicking him to the curb so I can get some work done before Monday morning. Before Corey left he said to me “I know we said we would not talk about work, but with your back ground I bet you could get a better job working for the district attorney, and before you say no way, Meuner is on his way out, too many discrepancies, and you did not hear that from me, they are moving him down state, and he will be an assistant rather than the main man.”

Me: “That sounds interesting, I would not mind working for the good guys for a change, although my boss said I was getting a raise and a bonus next check, so we will see how generous he is with the raise, that would have to be my starting salary.”

Corey nodded and gave me a kiss goodbye.

I went over the Stevens file there was not much for me to add or subtract, as I was putting it into my briefcase, I heard Larry come home, I went up stairs and knocked on his door, he came out arms folded and said “What!”

Me: “I come in peace, and bringing some information that you may want to hear.”

Larry: “Ok come in.”

I told Larry which of the attorney’s in my office that could finagle a deal, and get his record expunged, that he may have to do some community service and go to a few meetings also promise never to piss in public. He said first thing tomorrow he will make an appointment, and thanked me profusely.

I went back to my place, my cell phone was ringing it was my Boss Mr. Burns, he asked if I was doing anything for dinner, I asked if this was work or other, he said other, I told him I was seeing someone, and that I do not date those for whom I work especially my boss, he said that if I played my cards right he would not be my boss much longer. After hanging up I called Corey told him of the conversation and asked him to get me an application. Corey laughed and said he would, and added, maybe he was talking about a different kind of raise.

After hanging up I was convinced that Corey was right. Mr. Burns is an ass.

Corey did not get me the application till Thursday of that week, he said he wanted to wait till all the politics was finalized with respect to Meuner’s transfer. Corey and I agreed to meet after work Friday at my place, pick up a few things for me and we would spend time at his place downtown, walking distance from a bar his cousin owns.

When I received my check I received an extra $50 bonus, and a 2% raise. Pittance, I took my lunch break to speak to my future boss, before I left work at the law firm I gave my 2 week notice, Mr. Burns got wind of it and said, I could pack up then and there a severance will be sent to my place. I went to Mr. Burns boss to be sure I was dotting my i’s and crossing my t’s he wished me luck and just consider leaving early a paid vacation before I start my new position.

New Years Resolution Chapter 3

New Years resolution Chapter 3

I arrived at work 10 minutes ahead of my normal arrival, went directly to my cubical, put my things away. As I sat down to turn my computer on I heard something in my bosses office, he is not usually here at this time, I was concerned since he has many of the files concerning the Anderson case sitting on his desk.

I went over the door which was cracked open, what I saw was a man in a suit, he turned when he heard me at the door.

I said “Can I help you? Do you have an appointment with Mr. Burns?”

I recognized the gentleman as the district attorney, he knows better, some say he is as corrupt as John Anderson and company.

Brian Meuner said “I do have an appointment with Mr. Burns, I am a bit early is all.”

I said “Mr. Meuner, step out here I will get you a cup of coffee, a doughnut or bagel if you desire.”

He politely declined the offer of refreshments, came out of the office sat down on a chair next to my desk. I sat, looked directly at him when he said “I hear your quite the sweetheart around here.”

I responded “Excuse me?”

Meuner: “All your bosses like you, say you are nice to the clients and efficient, the office staff says you are like the girl next door, yet a friend of mine Corey Graham said you are an ice queen.”

I smiled slightly lightly squinted my eyes and said “What’s it to you, and what is your point exactly?”

Meuner: “Just making conversation is all.”

Me: “I am seeing it differently, you know better than to go into my Bosses office when he is not there, also your seeing if you can push my buttons, so to me this is not just making conversation as you say, it is more like you being an ass hole.”

Now that felt good, never I a million years would I have said that, thought it but never would have said it. I like the idea that Corey is talking about me, it is usually me doing that wondering about the other person. My resolution may actually bring a resolution to my empty heart syndrome.

Mr. Burns walked up and said to Meuner ”Your early, Helen I see is keeping you company.”

I said “Actually Mr. Meuner, was under the impression he could wait in your office for you till I made it clear he needs to wait out here for you.”

Tom’s eyebrow went up as he turned to Meuner and said “Well, seems you have been a bad boy, I heard you have a reputation for such shenanigans, glad Helen is on her toes.”

Tom turned to me and smile then said “Bucking for that raise Helen?”

I smiled and said “No thank you sir.”

That made him laugh and say “Touche’.”

If Meuner was confused by our conversation he did not show it, what did come across loud and clear he was pissed at me. I love it, in the passed if someone was pissed at me I would obsessed over the reason and would need to make amends. I picked up the phone and made an appoint with the salon across the street, my lunch will be spent getting a new hair do.

I came back to work after lunch with blonde spiky hair, no more shoulder length dishwater brown. Heads turned so quickly I wonder if anyone was going to get whiplash. My boss came back after an extended lunch walked over to me and said “Good for you Helen, it looks great!”

I spent the rest of the day on cloud nine, I also made a decision to be nice to Corey, being that he either works for or with Meuner. May be I can get a few digs about Meuner with Corey hoping he will share it with Meuner.

I left the office an hour late, the grand jury came back said they did not have enough to indite John Anderson. Mr. Burns said there will be a raise and a little extra on my next pay check. My report showed some discrepancies in Mr Anderson’s testimony which needed polishing.

Stepping into the train, there was only one seat left, next to another commuter but not Corey, I remembered Corey liked the pub at the second stop, that is where I got off. I found Corey sitting alone in the corner with a beer in front of him, a folder opened, I ordered a beer for me and Corey, sauntered over and sat down. He looked up with surprise written all over his face “Well hello Helen, nice hair, and nice to see you.”

Thank you Corey, I needed a change, and also I want to apologize for being an ice queen, I have decided to make some changes in my life and not get involved with every guy I come in contact with who seems to be interested, like Meuner, he is an ass no hope there.”

Corey laughed and said “Now there is something we agree on.”

Me: “Tell me Corey is Meuner your boss, we never have gotten into the particulars of what we do for a living, although I got the impression from Meuner that you know who I work for.”

Corey closed the folder he was working on, leaned back and said “You wouldn’t necessarily know me, your boss would, I have been lead detective on several cases your boss has handled.”

Me: “Now Corey, you pretending to be interested in me to get info, or to garner some sympathy?”

Corey: “Neither, when I first asked you for a drink I had no idea who you were till you told me your name, the fact you got onto the train at that particular station suggested you are the Helen Morris I have read in reports.”

New Years Resolution Chapter 2

New Year’s Resolution chapter 2

Corey and I had our drink, chatted, he became more and more touchy, I pushed his hand away, after the 3rd attempt I put money on the bar and said goodbye. He said “I said I was buying.”

I said “Not like where this is going, the cost would be too high for you and me.”

At that I left, head high and proud of myself. It felt good not to say yes right away, also felt good not to be the first to make eye contact of say something to get their attention. I did enjoy my conversation with Corey, he seemed nice enough, the way I figured it if he is truly interested he will try again if he sees me at the subway.

Walking back to the subway, it was dark, I was a bit nervous never being out in the dark walking anywhere, I am still in my work clothes, I do not know if it is my imagination, I am hearing footsteps behind me, they seem to be following me. I slow on purpose to see if whom ever it is will pass me, the steps slowed, I picked up my pace they picked up their pace. Once I reached the steps to go down into the subway, I took my heals off and ran down the stairs, was lucky to catch the first train to my destination. It was exhilarating to be out of my comfort zone, I put my shoes back on and made a mental note to wash my stockings as soon as I get home.

I was glad to be in my flat, it’s the bottom portion of a Victorian home, the owners fixed it up after the lady passed, turning it into 2 flats, the upstairs is inhabited by the owners son, Larry.

Larry works odd hours we rarely come in contact with each other, tonight Larry was sitting on the steps which lead to my flat.

Hey Larry, what’s going on?”

Hey Helen, hope you do not mind, it is a nice night I wanted a different view besides the back of our neighbors house.”

I sat down next to Larry and said “I get it, hey have you had dinner, I do not feel like cooking how about if we share a pizza, I have a six pack of beer in the fridge?”

Larry: “Sounds good, I will order the pizza, pepperoni and cheese good?”

Me: “Pepperoni and cheese is perfect, I want to change out of my work clothes take a quick shower be back in 15.”

Larry: “Nice outfit, see you in 15.”

I came back handed Larry a beer, he had a cooler sitting next to him, he said there were 4 in the cooler so we do not have to limit ourselves on such a warm night. I smiled and nodded amiably and said “Sounds good to me.” We clinked our bottles and took the first swig.

Old ratty Volkswagen pulled up with a sign plunked on top that said Little Caesars Pizza

Larry insisted on buying I thanked him, ran inside got a couple of plates and napkins, we sat in the chairs on the porch table between us and enjoyed the evening. I had to be careful, I still had one more day of work. Friday’s can be a bear or easy sailing, I am hoping for easy sailing. I still need to look closely at the Anderson file, I am suppose to find any discrepancies in the documents, also the testimony that was given in front of the Grand Jury, John Anderson is being indicted for racketeering, we are dotting our i’s and crossing our t’s. He is one our most lucrative accounts, someone in his organization is always needing help with something, this is the first time it was John Anderson, the head of the company or should I say syndicate.

Once I said good night to Larry and thanked him for the pizza and company, I told him I still had work to do to prepare a report for my boss. Larry was nice and said good night and the pleasure was all his.

Next morning I chose to wear, a white skirt and a bright blue blouse with blue shoes which matched the blouse perfectly. I got onto the train in the subway sat down, looking at my paper a coffee was slowly moved under my nose, a familiar voice said: “Good Morning Helen, how would you like a coffee.”

I raised my eyes ever so slowly and said good morning to Corey. He smiled and had this sweet sensual smile on his face, looking directly into my eyes. I figured he was trying to read me. I took a sip of coffee and gave my best poker face I could muster. Thanked him for the coffee and went back to my paper. Cool as a cucumber, yes changing your aura can be fun, but exhausting. Leaving the train, I threw the half full cup of coffee in a receptacle and walked to the exit. I really wanted to savor that coffee it was delicious, but that does not go well with my new demeanor.

New Years Resolution Chapter1

New years resolution Chapter 1

Each year I make a resolution, as many do to only break it or ignore it. When I was at the store to by end of season mark downs I noticed the TV’s on sale. Each had specifications on it’s resolution. This got me thinking about how I should approach my resolution, define what it is I am actually trying to accomplish, make my goal high definition, to see I if I can actually accomplish what goal I am setting.

This year my goal is not to fall for every loser that smiles, has a nice tush, good swagger and line. So here is where the resolution of my resolution comes to a cross road. Something about my behavior has to change and I do not have a clue as to what needs to change. I always made a joke with my friends that I must have an aura about me that draws the wrong guy. I will first set out to change my aura.

So I Googled it first they say to look at your strong points. I have asked my friends what my strong points are, their answers were the generic things, good sense of humor, nice looking, smart, fun to be around, easy going. Ok what part of that should I change, should I become the bitch from hell, not be as easy going. Someone once told me that guys like girls that give them a hard time, they want to tame the shrew or see it as a bad girl dangerous relationship.

Today I will give that a try, while I was at the market a nice guy walked up asked if I could show him how to pick the best melons.

I said:” All you have to do is take a long look, then you need to lean in and give them a sniff” At that I pulled his head to my breast, and said “Those are perfect, you can judge from perfection and you will only find mediocre.”

After I released him his wife came up and hit me with a raw chicken. We were asked to leave the market. I was asked never to come back again, while walking to my car the guy I gave the sniff test to waved goodbye. I need to find a different way to change my aura.

Match my surroundings with my thoughts, I suppose that is a chi thing, at work I added reds, and yellows to my cubical, I usually wear drab green, black, I bought some reds, blues, yellows, green clothing. When I walked in with my red blouse, black slacks, red heels, my boss asked me to come into his office and close the door. I accommodated him, sat down in front of his desk, asked “How can I help you sir?”

He said: “Are you looking for a raise.”

I said “Are you offering?”

He said: “Yes, depends on your end of year performance.”

I said: “Is this like studying for a finale exam do I have to cram for it?”

He said: “Only if you are not used to hard work.”

I said: “What next?”

He motioned me to come around the desk towards him, now I am getting nervous wondering what he wanted, felt relieved when he handed me the Anderson file. I was sweating bullets, he said as I was leaving “Had you worried didn’t I, nice outfit.”

I said “Respectfully sir, you are a shit!”

He laughed loudly, everyone turned to look at me, I just smiled gave a nod and went back to my cubicle.

At the end of the day I had been asked by 2 guys and 1 girl to go out, I turned them all down. Now that was a change for me I would have said yes to the first offer to go out. I will master my new aura.

I am resolved to resolve my failure of resolutions.

I take the subway to get home, sitting balancing a coffee and a paper, not wanting to make eye contact, which is different for me, I usually scan the possibilities and wonder if they like what they see. I want to be perceived as aloof.

Looking down I see a guy with long legs, wearing dress slacks, it was all I could do not to look over and check him out, wanting him to make the first move.

He leaned in and whispered in my ear “Wouldn’t you rather have a drink, instead of the coffee?”

I turned with the coolest look on my face as I could muster and asked “You buying?”

He smile a large easy grin and said “Yes mam, next stop has a nice bar.”

I said “I do not go to hovels, it must me a nicer place such as Marcus’s Bistro.”

Nodding he said “Marcus Bistro it is, my name is Cory”

I let a very slow calculated smile come to my face and said simply “Helen.”

Finding my way home Chapter 2

Finding my way home Chapter 2 – a Christmas story

I went to the counter to ask about my flight and was told due to the weather conditions in Chicago it was still on delay. The attendant apologized, I said no problem went back to where I was sitting. While I was away from my seat a family of five took over a row of seating. A husband, wife, 3 children there ages if I were to guess was 10 down to 5. The youngest was a girl, her 2 brothers were playing video games on hand held devises, she was napping on her moms lap. I heard the eldest whisper to his mom “Mom I am hungry can we get some McDonald’s?”

The mom shook her head, reached in a bag and pulled out a cheese and cracker combination. The other boy whined and said “Mom, why can’t we have McDonald’s?”

The father leaned over and said “Larry, we cannot afford it, we discussed this, I am sorry.”

By this exchange I gathered the family fell on hard times, but it left me wondering how they could afford plane tickets for a family of 5 and not burgers for the boys. The eldest was eating his crackers, not with any relish, he seemed to be nearly gagging them down. I wonder if I would be intruding if I asked if it would be ok for me to buy McDonald’s. I was about to do that when the father got up, I was figuring he was going to the men’s room. I got up as well and was reward by the fact I was right. This way it can be a private conversation. When the father came to wash his hands I broached the subject hoping I would not offend him, started the conversation by introducing myself.

Excuse me my name is Spencer, and I hope I do not offend you, but since it is the Christmas holiday I would like to offer to buy you and your family a McDonald’s meal.”

He stopped drying his hands, let out a breath, his shoulders drooped slightly, clearing his throat he said “My name is Jack, (paused) that would be very nice of you thank you.”

We left the men’s room together, I made sure the order included desert pie, Jack turned to me shook my hand and said “God bless you, and Merry Christmas.”

I said “God Bless you and hope for a prosperous New Year for you and your family.”

Our walk back to our seats Jack told me that he had lost his job, sold their house for what it was worth, having to pay another 10 thousand dollars to the bank, which left very little by way of savings, they would need until he finds another job. He and his family are on their way to his in laws place, to stay, while he looks for work. His in laws live in Kentucky, have a large farm, the kids love visiting and are thrilled they are going to live there. Jack is hoping he can find work in Kentucky seeing as how the kids love it there so much. I told Jack I will lift a prayer, I also shared my story.

When we got back to the waiting area, someone had taken my seat, it took me a while to find an empty chair, I did, against a wall, in the corner, this will suit me just fine, after I have my burger I want to close my eyes for awhile.

Once I sat and looked over at the kids, their faces were glowing with pleasure eating their meal. Jacks wife looked over at me with an acknowledging nod of a thank you, I returned the greeting.

Discarding my wrapper and bag, I stretched out my legs, crossed my arms with my backpack as my pillow I hoped to nap for an hour. It helps refresh and stave off the boredom. I barely closed my eyes when my phone rang. It was my sister Shawn. We chatted awhile about the lousy weather. Shawn said dad and mom were excited I decided to come home for Christmas. Shawn told me that they have a new dog name Kelsey, they adopted in the summer. Kelsey is going to obedience school but dad said the dog is so hyper she may flunk out of obedience school. Shawn and I both laughed at that, what an image that made in my head, dad taking this little Jack Russel to obedience school. My dad is 6’2” that alone would be a sight.

Once I hung up the phone I noticed Jack and his family getting up Jack and his wife waved goodbye, their flight was called. I stretched out my legs in hopes to get my nap after all.

The attendant came over to me and said “Excuse me sir, since the delay will be a bit longer the airline has a few courtesy rooms at the airport hotel, you can get some sleep there and you will be called when your flight arrives.”

I thanked her and said no thank you I can sleep anywhere, this will be just fine, give my room to a family instead.

Holiday travel-Poem

blended drive 2

Holiday travel- Poem

On the way to grandma’s house

winding through the traffic

each holiday from New years

we travel through:

Mothers and Father’s day

finding ourselves back in the loop

Christmas is tinseled

Epiphany of guilt trips we go.

From church to family

the lasting warm fuzzy feelings

dissipate within the heart

as life again takes precedent

Never bringing into focus

what truly matters

Life’s journey should have balance

not merely a loop of holidays

the winding travel should be done

each finding it’s way to love

and family with the pot of gold

being lasting friends

This journey ends

all too quickly

as end of life speed limit

is increased each day

Rejoice in what matters

align yourself in the lane

that takes you through the woods

opening itself to the hills of life

leaving the valley’s

In the rear view mirror

Deer Blended

Loving where we are going Poem


Coming together for something better


Loving where we are going

Not where we came from

Making life better

Glowing from it’s promise

Never diminishing it’s power

Wanting to be free

Not bring a disagree

Improve on my kin

Not the power within

Blend and keep

Myself and what I seek

Tuesday 20-20 ways Santa Sleighs you


20 ways Santa Sleighs you Christmas list

1. making you believe he exists even as an adult

2. eating your cookies and milk

3.never helping in decking the halls

4. twitching his nose leaving you the bills

5. telling you your too big to sit on his lap

6.Ho Ho’s when he see’s your naughty

7. Never paying attention when your nice

8. Not cleaning up after the Reindeer

9. Kissing the misses promising the north pole

10. The misses now compares the south and north poles

12. Kids are more anxious to see Santa than you

13. Let Rudolph play with your goat who now has a nose that glows

(Not sure what they were doing)

14. Never left you the bike you wanted

15. Instead of bike it was a mike for Karaoke machine

(might be hard of hearing?)

16. Told the wife you showed your Yule log at the Christmas party at work

(did not explain, it was a yule log cake)

17. Left a drum set for your eldest son who ran off at 16 to join a rock band

18. Is pleased his image can stand in front of City Hall and not a Nativity


19. Speeds through the ski and you cannot fly your drone

20. puts sleigh on auto pilot and pisses off the side, and tells you it’s raining

Life in the fast Lane Chapter 5 Finale

Living in the fast lane Chapter 5

Wednesday I called the Road Commission asked when they thought Route 100 would be cleared, the secretary who answered the phone told me they had a couple of trucks down, apologized for the inconvenience she did not think Route 100 would be cleared till Friday.

According to the news emergency vehicles were getting stuck, volunteers went out with their tractors and whatever other machinery they had to help. I knew I needed to clear the snow off the roof. Jazzile was scared I might fall and hurt myself, if the emergency vehicles could not get here to help me she would not know what she would do if something were to happen to me. I told her I would be fine, I have done this a million times, and I needed to get the weight off the roof.

She finally agreed that I should do it. She spent some time getting accounts set up to do her work at home, put together a makeshift office in the old master bedroom using the coffee table as a desk, setting up pillows to sit on and leaned a pillow against the wall for support. That is where I left her, she was working away on her computer, and we had bought a Verizon air card which her boss said he would put the monthly payment for the air card in with her pay.

First thing I did was open the barn, I stood looking at all that had been accomplished, I was lost in thought for a half hour before I got started on the roof. Grabbing the large ladder, my support gear to tether me so if I were to slip it would keep me from cracking my head open, I really do not think with as much snow as we have that was going to be an issue. Grabbing the roof rake I started to make a path about a foot wide giving me a space to climb up and work on the roof. Once on the roof I tried to methodically work the area opposite the barn then slowly work my way to the other side of the roof.

After finishing and putting things away I went inside to find Jazzile I expected to find her in the kitchen or still at her computer. Her coat was still on the hook as were her boots, but she was nowhere in the house. I walked to the water’s edge, called her name a dozen times, went back to the barn called for her. The truck was still in the barn she could not have gone far. I did not see any foot prints, standing there panic started to seize me, I had no idea where else to look I called her phone, it rang in the house, I ran in hoping somehow I missed her.

Walking back out the front door I noticed her slipper laying alongside the house, I stared at it trying to make sense of why it would be lying there like that, when the horror gripped me, I ran to the large mound of snow I pushed off the roof and started to dig and dig till my hands were blue and bloody, I stopped only long enough to call 911.

By the time someone arrived I was sitting in the snow holding my Jazzile in my arms rocking and sobbing, I was so inconsolable they took me to the hospital, and took Jazzile’s remains to the morgue.